Hi again @MikeD1 - it works like this. Any passwords you create as Owned by the Organization will be shared between both of you. If you create a password that is owned by your username, it will reside only in your Personal (private) vault. This distinction is just where those passwords are stored in the system.
Organizational items can be shared.
Personal items are private and will not be seen by others.
When you look at My Vault in Bitwarden, it displays all of your personal items and all of your shared organizational items.
As Dan mentioned above, if you saved your passwords to the organization and your wife can see them, that’s expected behaviour. If your wife entered her passwords but you can’t see those items, then they must have been created within her personal vault. To share them to you, she must move those items to the organization instead.
This post might provide some more useful info:
Hope that helps!